Wild Soul Awakening

“Life will give you whatever experience is most helpful for the evolution of your consciousness. How do you know this is the experience you need? Because this is the experience you are having at the moment.” –@eckharttolle

My time in Portugal has been challenging, for many reasons. But I keep coming back to this. That I am here to learn something from my experience — and from my fear and sadness — rings profoundly true. Shadow work is not easy. But by allowing the dark to coexist with the light — by accepting and not resisting — it opens up a path to go deeper.

Today I let myself go into that pain during a voice healing session with  Smadar on the beach. I cried and screamed and sang as the waves crashed upon the sand and rocks around me. The energy that moved through me, the resonance of my voice, the connection to Spirit, and the deep release I felt was like nothing I’ve ever experienced before.

There is tremendous power in accepting the darkness with the light. In allowing all parts of the whole to simply be. To acknowledge the shadow as a teacher and allow it to bring us on a profound journey to the other side.

My heart is grateful for all of the teachers in my life and that Spirit led me to Smadar, for her Light is the purest gift. And to my internal teacher — to the light and fire within me — I bow. Ong Namo Guru Dev Namo.

After 2 weeks in the UK, I decided to spontaneously book a trip to Portugal! It has been on my radar for awhile, and I’m thrilled to be in Lisbon for a whirlwind 36 hours. Next I will head to Aljezur and Lagos (southern coast) for a change of pace. I have been spending so much time working and exploring cities, so it will be nice to have some time off the beaten path again to catch a breath and integrate all of my experiences so far. I’ll actually be pet sitting for two sweet rescue dogs and will have some time to meditate, practice yoga, sing, walk, and focus on some bigger picture visions for work and life. I’m hoping to get back up to Lisbon and then Sintra and Porto, so we shall see what unfolds!

I call it a beginning, but I’ve actually been on this journey my entire life. It’s one we’ve all been invited into, really, since the day we entered this world. We all seem to hear the call in various ways and at different times.

I’ve heard its whisper before, and even set out on the path a few times. Sometimes I’ve listened intently and with great care. At other times I’ve lost the signal or straight up stopped trying.

We may veer off the trail — willfully or accidentally. But if we remain open, the call to Awakening — the invitation to live from our Wild Souls — always finds us again.

I have heard it more faintly in my adult years. Every once in awhile I’d catch what sounded like a few notes of the most beautifully haunting melody — a melody that I couldn’t quite place, but one that I seem to have always known.

Gradually, in recent years, the gaps between the notes of the song have begun to get shorter. And then for reasons I can’t explain, something shifted this past summer that busted my heart wide open. The music was suddenly louder and more consistent.

As I heard it more clearly, it anchored me and called me to hold on to it — to follow it. There were days I thought I lost track of it, but then I’d catch a few more notes. It was as though I was uncovering clues that lead to a precious treasure.

And then, almost without realizing it, I was singing along. Humming at first, still unsure of the melody. Soon I was singing words my brain had never heard, as though my spirit had chanted this hymn thousands of times in eternity.

It’s this song that led me to Costa Rica for singing and meditation, and now to London for a voice workshop. It’s the same melody that both connects me to, and, at the same time, simply IS: Love, Spirit, the divine, Pachamama, nature, my brothers and sisters, my purpose, my heart. Like a beautiful icaro from my higher self, it reminds me of who I am. Sometimes it’s a sweet lullaby and sometimes it’s a fierce and guttural cry that sounds otherworldly. And it calls me to awaken to this knowing daily.

This alchemy may have a different form for you. It may be art or dance or poetry or philosophy or a feeling somewhere in your body. It’s what Paul Coehlo calls the Language of the World. It surpasses explanation, but you know it’s always been a part of you. Loving you. Guiding you. Calling you.

My song is calling me to share my voice. And so I shall in the midst of the unfolding awakening. I hope you will join me.

Con mucho amor y la cancion de mi alma salvaje despertar. (With much love and the song of my wild soul awakening.)

I’m still finding words to describe my time in Costa Rica. It was among the richest and most beautiful experiences of my life. My heart has expanded in ways I couldn’t have imagined, and I let in so much love. I deepened my connection to self, to nature and the divine, to others. I am so grateful for this life and to be on this path. ✨

Inspired by this loving force that ties us together, our dear brother, @jackpcarson, who only recently graduated from high school, wrote this beautiful song one night:

Brothers, sisters, friends

I love you all; it never ends.

You’ve touched my heart, each one of you.

I’m sorry, I love you, and thank you.

Pachamama I’m home

With the people whom I belong

Pachamama I’m finally home 

I love you, I miss you, it’s been so long 

Brothers, sisters wipe your tears away

Your mother and father are here to stay

No matter how far they may seem

They’re always inside of you and me

Thank you, thank you for this life

I love you, I love you, I truly love you 

Pachamama I’m home

With the people whom I belong

Pachamama I’m finally home 

I love you, I miss you, it’s been so long 

PaThank you, thank you, thank you, thank you ❤️

Tomorrow a long awaited journey begins. A journey I didn’t actually know until two weeks ago where or when it would commence – but one I knew I was being called to. I just kept following the breadcrumbs, uncovering clues as the Universe revealed them to me. And when the window opened, I leapt through.

In two weeks I packed up my photo studio and half of my apartment. I had 8 photo shoots, took a quick trip to Houston to be with dear friends, watched another friend’s sweet pup, squeezed in dr. appointments, edited my little heart away, saw the fruition of planning a lecture, and hosted a workshop at my studio.

Now my soul is ready. The next 10 days I’ll be in Costa Rica on a spiritual retreat getting in deeper touch with my inner guidance and soaking in whatever the Universe has planned. I’ll be off the grid but looking forward to sharing as I feel led following. Amor. ❤️